Cozy cottage near Area 51
Warm and friendly, unlike many extraterrestrial visitors, you'll adore this cute bungalow setting on the legal fringes of Area 51. My last roomie was kidnapped by aliens, or used in some nefarious government testing, I'm not sure which but I have some startling photos of the whole incident. Well, had some photos... the men in black came, stole them all after brainwashing me. Regressive hypnotherapy revealed the truth, and the truth is out there. Seems my sister was never a clone and I had just fallen on my head when I was younger, running on my Slip-n-Slide. I'm going to Aerik's Regression Therapy for confirmation on that, though. But my last roomie was kidnapped. So, if you like grey, big-eyed beings probing your anus in the middle of the night, if you enjoy being experimented on by alien lifeforms, crave a little adventure and danger, contact me. The phone number is hidden somewhere on this page, along with the secret code-phrase you'll need to gain clearance. Never can be too careful these days. And repeat the word "kilo" three times every ten minutes you're on the phone. They have ears everywhere. "Kilo" annoys the heck out of them. And while the cottage is small, it also has less hiding places for the aliens to utilize. Safer that way.