TRAVESTY's house moving service.

That's right! Move your WHOLE house for only $15.99, to anywhere in the world you want to go... Burmuda, Istanbul, Guam, and even Wyoming! Guaranteed fast and dependable service. Not responsible for lost, stolen, damaged, or demolished belongings.

*Due to erratic fears...Please nothing with wings, nothing that creeps, crawls, is red, or blue, or green, or yellow, or containing any of those colors, or a lack of those colors, no dogs, cats, birds, no gerbils, definitely no snakes, no air, no dark, no heights, no closed spaces, no open places, no paper bags, no fires, no cigarettes, no coffee mugs with Bugs Bunny on them, no shoes, no shirt, no service, no hats, no cars, no straws, she hates straws, no Taco Bell damned dogs on cruiser cups, no wallpaper, no lack of it, no foreign accents, no lack of them, no grass, no bugs, no carpets, no dirty clothes, no clean clothes, definitely no laundry baskets, no stuffed animals, and NEVER EVER anything that resembles week old chocolate mousse. All restrictions apply, offer not valid in Idaho.